The Awkward Grasshopper

Wow, it’s been a while since I’ve posted anything. I’ve had so many thoughts that I’ve meant to type out, but alas, real life interferred with all of my “extra time” to write about it.

I’m currently training for a marathon. It’s been really interesting. I’m a really terrible “dieter” and find that if I don’t burn off some of my energy, I get quite moody. Reactive, specifically. Anyway, between those two issues, running seems to be a good fit for my personality.

I ran my first half marathon in September. It went really well, so I decided to take on the big 26.2 run. Currently, my long runs are 16-18 miles, and I’m doing okay with it. However, my body starts to fall apart on me if I don’t cross train. I hit the gym a few days a week, and recently joined….wait for it….Karate. Tae Kwon Do, specifically.

Let’s be honest. Karate is not cool. Unless you are a blackbelt, of course. Then, and only then, are you cool. Which, I’m not. I’m the 36 year old lady in the back of the class in stark white. Not. Cool. However, my hubby has studied another form of karate in the past, and really enjoyed it. He has talked about going back for years, and especially since our son has joined, but isn’t the kind of person to go out of his way to do something that doesn’t include his family, unless encouraged. Encouraged only by me jumping on the Not -Cool karate bandwagon with him.

Don’t get me wrong. I’ve come to enjoy it a bit. My husband gets almost giddy before class, which of course, makes me happy. I’m learning how to take a punch and how to throw a few, and who doesn’t want that? I’ve also filled the cross training need in my marathon training. However, in over a month, I’ve told only two friends of this venture. Not cool, remember?

I’m a big Facebook junkie. It’s basically my socializing on most days. Prior to joining karate, my instructor was my Facebook friend. Like my real life, I am quite picky about who my friends are. Every so often, I “clean Facebook house”…i.e., unfriend people I don’t really speak with, or don’t remember clearly, even though 48 of my high school friends are common friends with that person. Basically, if I have a friend on Facebook, it’s by no means, to have a high number of “friends”. I say this because my Karate instructor is my friend. Well, was my friend. Until last week….

My hubby and I (the geeky white belts) were bowing out after class last week, when my instructor says to me (from across the studio- or dojo), “Hey, Sarah, I’m going to have to unfriend you on Facebook, because I’m just not suppose to be friends with my students.” Uh….awkward, as I’m standing with all of the other students, who obviously witnessed the awkwardness. Did you hear that? Yeah, it was a pin dropping. Sweet.

Yes, some of you may not think that this is a big deal. Maybe even most of you. Well, good for you. You are more evolved than I. For me, the geeky white belt, who was already learning humility through just being in class, being shunned by the 23 year old karate instructor in front of the other students was well, too much.

The hubby looks at me, I look at him. I say, “Uh…Ok.” I mean, what am I suppose to say? I think he – the instructor- was trying to make it casual. I really do. Maybe  he was trying to follow the rules and be professional, and from his perspective, could help him to be more respected by his students. Albeit, he was misguided in his attempt. There is also the possibility that he  doesn’t like me. Either way, my ego was in a bad state.

The hubby and I left. I discussed the awkwardness of the situation with my husband, who laughed uncomfortably, and then reminded me that the instructor was young. A very good point. Yet, I still couldn’t shake it. So, I immediately went home and unfriended him with a private message, kindly explaining how his open discussion make me feel incredibly uncomfortable. He called the next day. He told me that although the rule could be taken into more of a “gray area” context, because it was a rule specifically designed for underage students, for him, it was a black or white issue. Okay, then. Still awkward. At this point, I’m feeling really uncool. Apparently my ego is larger than I realized. Wow.

I went to class tonight. I listened politely as my instructor talked (again) about his friend’s new baby, and when he turned to ask me where my “partner in crime” was. My response was “not here, sir”. Black or white. I figured it was a better response than “none of your business.” Yes, I am 12, and a 12 year old with a bruised ego is not cool either.

3 Responses to “The Awkward Grasshopper”

  • Ann Wray:

    Hi Sarah, If you would like an opinion. I think that even though he is young he handled the facebook thing very very badly or at least in the most ego oriented (him) way to put down two people older and make himself look powerful to everyone there. Clearly a quiet moment after class explaining the rules would have sufficed. I think your response was in line with his action. He demanded not friendship but a master student relationship and he has basically told you how he wants you to act and you responded as he requested.

  • marathon training, going to the gym, karate and a mother of 3…..YOU ROCK!

  • Becky:

    First off, let me say…THANK YOU for posting another great story! I love reading your blog!!! Second, I say screw that power-tripper! You would’ve probably “cleaned” him out eventually anyway!
    And third, KUDOS to you!!! You’re amazing!!! I’m honored to be your friend! :)
    Love and hugs! <3

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