2 Earrings and a Fat Coat

I’ve had some great responses to my blog adventure, including some great support from friends, old and new, and  as well as some questions – “what is it exactly that you’re doing?” to which, I have no response for. If I could only answer that one question – in every aspect of my life, actually. I have no idea. What is it that I’m doing? Not a friggen clue.

Today was one of those days that was made of up the things that make up most of my days. Kids, dentist appointment, work, friends, lessons for the kids, doctor appointment for the sick kids, etc…  I had a defining moment, however. It was in regards to my hubby.

A good friend took me out to lunch today, as a belated birthday present. Prior to lunch, we had a quick shopping expedition, where I mentioned that I’m thinking I would suggest to my hubby that he get both of his ears pierced and wear diamonds – not real, as he would lose them – in each ear. She was laughing, as I assume many people would. I’m not sure even why I find this attractive, nor do I know if it would look so hot on my husband, but it has recently crossed my mind. This friend was laughing because my husband is a professional, and the double diamond earring look may not work for him. She also said she may have to think on the idea. We were both laughing, and I told her that my husband would do it if I really wanted him to. My friend responded with something like, ” Of course he would. We know how easy you have it with him,” or ” We know he would. If only we all had it as easy as you.” This was not a sarcastic or snide remark. It’s the truth. My husband can be a real Pain in the Ass. Like most human men – or like most humans, for that matter. He also would bend over backwards to make me happy. It was not just a defining moment, I guess, but a reminder of the man I married. Although, the double diamond earring debate is still on, I appreciated the light my friend shone on my beautiful (most of the time) partner in life.

My middle child, who I will now refer to as Bugs, had a great day today. He was “on”, and frankly, I appreciate those days, and give him lots of praise for them. However, I experienced a moment that I was reminded to think less like a mom and appreciate the humor in who he is. We had just arrived at the stables where the boys take their riding lessons. My oldest had been out riding for the first half of the lesson, so it was time for Bugs to get ready, which included socks, riding boots, helmet and warm coat. All while standing in the back of our vehicle because of the heavy rainfall outside. He finishes and tells me he’s ready. I tell him he needs to put on his warm coat. He tells me he doesn’t want to wear his coat because it makes him look sooo fat. First of all, he’s 5. Secondly, the kid is in fact, underweight. His 15 month old brother weighs just 9 pounds less than he does, and this isn’t because Bugs undereats. In fact, he’s my best eater. It’s just the way his body is, and his freakishly fast metabolic rate. Thirdly, we aren’t the family that talks about being “fat”. I have always been cognizant of body image that I project and if I’m feeling “fat”, the kids won’t hear it. So, after I analyzed his comment and not only took the “how am I responsible for this” out of the equation, while simutaneously red flagging it for something to watch out for, I looked at it for what it was. Ridiculous. So, I started laughing. I know, if you are reading this and don’t know me, you may be concerned for my child’s self-worth. Or that he may have an eating disorder at 5 – which is so hilarious in itself, that I won’t even explain either too much. However, I will say, I’m trying very hard to make sure he grows up with all the stuff that helps in those departments.

Having kids is a constant reminder for me, that everyone is different, because my 3 boys couldn’t be more different. I so often am trying to get them to conform to so many things. Manners, politeness, education, expectations, etc…, that I often forget that they are their own little selves. I am not their only teacher, and I can only control the words and sights in my home. Bugs thinks high heels are slimming, too, and I’m pretty sure I didn’t teach him this.

2 Responses to “2 Earrings and a Fat Coat”

  • Teresa:

    Too funny! Cody went through this in 2nd grade. He would not wear his coat because it “made him look fat”. Seriously, Cody, my scrawny little tike who could barely keep his pants up when standing to pee! He still to this day wears only fitted coats, jackets or more often, hoodies. It’s nice to know he’s not the only male that finds certain coats unflattering.

  • Becky:

    I am so loving your blog! Even though I’ve only read two entries. I love how you capture the trials, tribulations and joys of motherhood! I also love how you described K. I fully feel the exact same way about my beautiful twins and husband! Thank you for inviting us into your inner thoughts! It’s a real refreshing comfort compared to the false realities I’m sometimes surrounded by. I appreciate knowing that I’m not the only one that goes through trying moments as a mother! I also need to remind myself to relax and let the twins be kids! I have to trust that what I’ve taught them will stay with them, even when I’m not. :)

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